As your divorce lawyer should inform you, social media has been known to have a negative effect on divorce proceedings, both in and out of court.
Sometimes spouses may be having an online affair, and the other spouse finds out about it on social media. In general, people are less discreet nowadays, in part due to their propensity to share many aspects of their lives online, including with friends, family and complete strangers.
Some researchers have concluded that people who do not use social media, or use it minimally, have up to 11% happier marriages.
Oftentimes Facebook is cited in divorce court as one of the ways a spouse found out the other was cheating. One study claimed that FB is cited in one out of every five divorces in the U.S.
According to the AAML (American Academy of Matrimonial Lawyers), 81 percent of divorce attorneys are reporting an increase of spouse’s searching online for proof of infidelity.
Some couples going through a divorce may seek to vent their anger on social media. This can include negative and derogatory posts about their spouses. If you are posting remarks or images about your ex on social media, there is a great chance they will see it, and so will the judge, when their lawyer brings it into court.
Here are some common-sense pointers to follow if you’re going through a divorce;
1. Stop using social media during your divorce because you are bound to slip and say something that can be used against you in court. And keep in mind that things can get twisted around on court. What you say may be misconstrued to mean the worst!
2. If you are determined to stay on social media while you are going through a divorce, never say anything negative about your spouse, their family or your children when you post! Your children are watching what you post also, whether you believe it or not.
3. Don’t use social media to share your feelings about what you are going through! Save it for after the divorce. How would you feel if a judge read your posts out loud in Divorce Court? Keep this in mind when you post!
4. Only post positive things; affirmations from Budda and beautiful pictures, maybe of happy times you had with your children.
5. Don’t post anything that could anger your spouse! An example of this might be pictures of you on vacation with your new love interest. A court may frown up on this!
6. Keep in mind your ex may send spies to pump you for information or spy on you on social media. Is it really so far-fetched? Did you see the Johnny Depp / Amber Hurd trial on tv? People will stoop to new lows to get the goods on you!
7. Remove your relationship status from your profile on Facebook and anywhere else it may show up. Keep your marital status private at all times during a divorce!
8. Don’t discuss your case, in anyway, online. Even good situations can be taken out of context. Your private life does NOT belong on FB during a divorce!
9. Don't ask any of your friends to make negative posts about your spouse online. They could end up in the hotseat, testifying against you- that you put them up to it.
10. It goes without saying- never post intimate or embarrassing photos of you and / or your spouse online! A judge doesn’t need to see your undergarments!
11. Never post any conversations you may have had with your divorce attorney. These are privileged and should only be kept between you and your divorce lawyer.
12. Monitor your children’s social media posts also. They may be saying things behind your back- to their friends, that could end up in court. Bottom line: EVERBODY – KEEP YOUR MOUTHS SHUT DURING A DIVORCE!
13. If you are searching for a divorce attorney, you might find this article helpful.